3 Things (for the ladies) to Look Out for

Men are the happy-go-lucky creatures when it comes to sex. Easily seeding their love and then 1.Bring up their kids 2.Find another hole to seed. The ladies HAVE the rights to be informed of men, no matter how destructive this article is.

I have always believed that no matter how hopeless or impossible for you (the ladies) to fall in love again, there IS a guy out there who will change that mindset of yours. Sure, men are jerks, they are dicks, some have no brains even in two heads. You just need to find one that has brains in both. And when he appears, trust me, you can never wriggle your way out of that intense love he will shower on you.

So, what three things do I want you ladies to take note of?

3. Feel-Good Sensation.

You might have been hurt by tons of guys, have never gone into a relationship, or am looking for causal sex where two beings do ‘sports’ together. All that matters is – being happy. Cliche I know, but that happiness you feel will last a long time as soon as it fits you. At the very least, you won’t be hurt while with him.

A colleague once told me, ‘你要找一个你不舍得生气的人。’ In translation, ‘I have to find someone I can’t bear to get angry at.’

How meaningful is that? At times in a relationship, conflicts are bound to happen. You can;

  1. Keep quiet and compromise, burying that grudge forever.
  2. Discuss and take half a step back each.
  3. Take comfort in his/ her happiness and compromise.

Before all that beautiful shit can happen, it is key to find someone who doesn’t let you feel a single bit of unhappiness, and that applies to that potential fling talking to you. He might not have the tool to make you extremely happy, but he shouldn’t get in the way of your own happiness with all those emotional bullshit.

So how do you know if he is the one to be either your lifelong parter or fling? Being with him should empower you to do more. You might find yourself pushing a bit harder, working a bit longer, smiling more often, passing days faster, simply by knowing that he is in your life (and you want to see him soon).

In this current society, it is very unlikely to only have one breadwinner, which is kind of accepted by both genders now. Even having flings is no longer seen as only a ‘guy’s thing’. So, the least you could do for yourself is to find someone who doesn’t negatively affect your life. Believe me, it is an awesome feeling to feel that ‘on-your-toes’ sensation with him around.

This point applies to all short to long term relationships. If there are detrimental emotions between you two, then you might want to reconsider your relationship. The one person you don’t want to disappoint is yourself.

2. Secrets

Everyone has secrets. While some childhood abuse are traumatic, some find them erotic. A woman has her rights to keep secrets from her man, to protect his ego and uphold his pride. He shouldn’t be poking too much into your past if you DID hint (could be unconsciously), and understand that what you are holding from him is for his own good.

Moving away from marriage and BGR, let’s talk about flings. There are many levels you want to have causal sex at. Some are normal friendships turned into secret trysts, and some just want to keep things really clear cut – fuck-and-go. And of course, in betweens! He knows everything sexual about you, but nothing about you.

There are creepy men out there who are into emotional blackmail, though they never meant harm. They will surprise you with personal information you never told them, they will ask you about your family with accurate details, they will try to accompany you home no matter how many times you turn them down.

There will be a few that digs really deep into your sexual fantasies, to a point of discomfort. They want to know why are you so into daddy kinks, or domination, as if ‘to get a feel’ is not a good enough explanation. Only tell what you are fine with going public, only show what you are fine with going online.

While I am concerned with my public image, there are many out there with ‘nothing to lose’.

1. Detachment

You might want to be with a guy for sex, but there is a possibility that you aren’t the only girl he is fucking. While there are signs you can pick up, it is impossible to get to the bottom with some men who can keep secrets well.

Getting emotions into the picture is only natural, since you are connecting at the most intimate level. There is one thing I admire women for though, it’s their instincts. A woman’s instinct never goes wrong when it comes to everything. We men always imagine ‘instincts’ to be a ‘lie-detector’, but you ladies should have it figured out that it is more of a ‘truth-detector’.

Listen to your heart less closely if it’s casual sex, but trust your sixth sense. It is the only immediate defence when it comes to STDs, and there shouldn’t be any pressure to just get it on for his sake. If he is not meant to get into your panties, don’t let him. Remember not to disappoint yourself. (I’m not touching the cheating partner topic here)

Men need respect ladies a bit more, and with more ladies educating the men, we could see a fairer, more respectful, more considerate world soon. It will benefit everyone no matter for flings or marriage.


While Jhae tries to educate through these articles, it is up to the individuals to sober up and do something for humanity. The collective misery of the human race is too dire to ignore, and the world can easily be a better place when one less person feels bad.

We (men) can’t do without you (ladies), so as surprising as it may sound to have someone jerking off to your photos, I do respect you a lot. Take pride in being a figure of fantasy, take pride that someone out there is looking for you. As rewarding as flings might sound, give the men only what they deserve.

World Peace! ^_^v

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