How (not) to get a Fwb or NSA

For a start, this entry is more for the guys than the girls. Cause there seems to be no limits to what guys will do to get a girl, for any reasons at all. As much as some of you might get offended, I hope you can read between the lines.

What do you guys think of the ladies who are looking for fwb? Are they horny beyond a single man’s capacity to please them? Or filling a void in their emotional state only a dick would fit? If you are a lady reading this, you will know it’s none of the above. Nowhere close at all.

1. Any woman can satisfy themselves without a man’s help. They have their fingers, household tools or toys. Most importantly, they have their minds. Women are a species we (men) can never fully grasp (not even J), because they can get themselves off with just thoughts. Yes, their minds are that powerful.

2. Nothing physical can ever fill their emotional or spiritual needs. It can go two ways, either ‘no dick is big enough’, or ‘the smallest one will touch the deepest spot’. Men are physical creatures (women a smaller extent), ruled by instincts for survival and meeting demands of ‘needs’. Perhaps we will never be as good as how a women can decipher their own emotions. Look how hard we are trying.

Ladies seek men for a few things much further than ‘making babies’ in our current society. Stability, a strong figure to guide them and provide a pillar that is deep enough for them to go further at what they were doing – that’s a ‘lifelong partner’ for you.

Second, it is to relieve a sexual urge. And it works only two ways. Either it’s a cold, lifeless toy they have full control over, or a warm animated body that has full control over themselves. Here is the jizz. Do you guys have full control over yourselves? Perhaps the moment you posted ‘looking for fwb’ was what caused you to be kicked out of the list.

While women are looking to satisfy their emotional needs so they can function better, we men are looking to satisfy our physical needs so we can function normally. See what picture we are painting for the ladies?

Lastly, if you know a lady is looking for lifelong partner, please have some respect and clarify your intents. It might even gain you some respect and hopefully a chance at it. Whatever you are tempted to do to an honest lady looking for a lifelong parter, be it leverage or false hope, it’s going to cause more hurt to your own karma.

3. How to get a fwb?

One, be independent. Don’t act like you have an opening for someone to make your life better. Be more like ‘Your life is already at its best, and you’re looking for someone to share it with’. Makes sense?

Two. Instead of trying to get what you ask for, or pretending to be someone the ladies need, how about making friends for a start? Don’t overlook what FWB means. Seriously, does anyone of us get what we want in life? I have to work hard for it. Investing time, effort, patience.

You know ladies are more emotional. They seek understanding or comprehension more than anything. If you can’t provide a shoulder to lean on, then they won’t need your dick to work out on.

4. Why you will never get a FWB? (Seriously, if you are offended, then keep doing what you do.)

This is the most important part. You can actually work backwards from here to find the solution. Can I use CAPS for this part? IF A LADY WANTS A DICK, WOULD THEY HAVE TO FIND SOMEONE WHO IS LOOKING TO LOAN THEIRS? There you have it. If they are looking to get laid, they don’t have to look far. There are always bigger, thicker, longer nearby.

They can write ‘More than 8 inches’ and most of us will be out of the picture. I know I don’t have 100% of what it takes to be a lady’s FWB, so I work on what I am good at. We are all capable of making friends, spending time on dinners, long walks, heart-to-heart chats.

If they can share their darkest secrets from their sexual side casually with you, AND with an open mind (or even looking) for a FWB, you might stand a chance. What they have shared with you, are things that they can’t tell to normal friends. Even ‘best friends’ might not reach that boundary. I don’t really know how to put this, you will know it when you have gone beyond friends with her. Note: This is not to be confused with ‘love’, cause there ARE secrets not meant for their lifelong partners.

This is what I learnt throughout my failed relationships. If you can provide all the emotional and spiritual support a woman needs, she will provide all you need to stay beside her. For marriages, for the FWBs. One look, and ladies can tell if you are serious or just up for FWBs, from then on, you are judged. Score well from the start.

One wrong move, and the ladies’ just-to-be safe mechanism kicks in, and you’re out. No second chances. Get it right the first time. While everybody is raising hands at any ladies looking for a FWB, are you game enough to keep your hands down to stand out from the rest?

This entry is inspired by Ena, writer of Promiscuous Secret (now in dysfunct).

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