Writing as never been an easy task for me. A lot of things has to be right to even begin. The quietness of the environment, the occasional visual stimuli, the mood has to be just right. Ever since I started out about two years ago, it has been a journey of research, learning and applying the best of my English. And reading my old entries, I could see the little but proud progress I made. A few of you might not think much of the improvement, but having a little is better than none.
I would always choose an environment that is quiet, usually writing at my void deck. It would help to let me travel back in time, and replay every scene that I was about to translate into words. The more difficult part would be putting myself in the female’s shoes and write what she felt, which being a guy, I had no idea of. The cold winds, sometimes rainy nights, or in the light of the sun, that looked so glaring but soothingly warm. I was conditioned to write in that ambience, and one that would not change. At times, writing at home would help, since I had access to my laptop which can multitask, looking up terms to clothing that better described what was worn, and positions that had a few accompanying words I can add. For the rest of the time I wrote below my flat, I did it on my iPad which kept me focused with the lack of multitasking.
Visual stimuli is not to be mistaken as porn, but actually the occasional passing of residents, which some dressed in their best for work, or skimpy for clubs, and just casual to buy something nearby. Watching eyes on me bothered me the least, after all, it is not common to see an iPad working wirelessly with the Apple Wireless keyboard. Apart from the random people that walked by, it was not the most important for me to keep going.
Getting in the right mood is the most tedious part. For a start, if you understand yourself, or guys (for the female readers), you would know that the sensation of ‘sian’ (lethargic or tiredness) after you cummed. Sadly, we (guys) are not tuned to have multiple orgasms without external efforts, so, my energy has to be reserved for the one time release. If a man went without relieve for a long time, you would expect him to feel a little more energetic and willing to make the trip or effort to find someone to help him out or somewhere to release.
Keeping myself controlled and un-cummed is the first step to get into the horny mode to write. Yes, I write when I am turned on, and it helps a lot. It would make me desperate at times to end the story with the cumming part, but it is another thing to hold myself back, and focus on the details that would help you to visualise the scenes and emotions. Putting myself into slo-mo, that was when all the tiny descriptions make up the story.
After that, I will leave it all to my hormones to play the story out, be it recounts or fantasies. Writing is my alternative to masturbation, and since it worked that way, the urge to get myself off was reduced, in turn, generating the stories that you all came to read. Not too bad a life cycle I would say. Cumming in the story is as good as cumming in real life, that is if you guys would ever understand what that means.
Doing research to write seems like lame, since we men know how pleasure felt like. But for the ladies, it is more than just pleasure. It can be guilt, sorrow, the heartbreak, the nightmare. They are more concerned about the whole package instead of just ‘oh yes oh yes. keep going.’ To write unbiased, I had to learn a lot more about them (which I estimate is just the tip of the iceberg) and let their untold emotions be heard. As eager as I am to tell everyone how good the male or female lead is feeling, there has to be more than just the ejaculation that men are looking for, or the climax.
Don’t you feel at times it is just the recognition and approval that you wanted instead of just cumming? Or getting the attention you never received? Or burying the sorrow and sadness in sex? Guilt of doing the wrong things yet enjoying it? There is too much to tell in words, and I am sure the female readers would agree.
In a way, I will never be able to fully express how girls feel through questions and observations, because there are some things that cannot be told, in fact, never be told to men. And just like them, men have their secrets that exists, no matter what the wedding vows would make them pledge, or the thirty years of marriage with beautiful kids they might have, that can never be told.
So, while I keep writing, you guys keep reading, and learn a bit more about the other gender. I understand that as some of you enjoy the rape (for example) stories, others might look at it at a subjective piece of information, letting the judgemental state of mind take over and even feeling unfair or frustrated. There is no way a person can be two gender completely, so, strong topics are often misunderstood if not in the person’s shoes.
Week one of the new year has ended and I am about to begin on my new career at a new company. Do give me your support by reading, or if you are slightly more well to do, can contact me for something I think everyone would need. Just making a living here.