Sad Facts, Not Fucks

New year is coming guys! And is there any invitations to countdown parties? Perhaps one of you can throw one for the writers? Today, I’ve been wanting to talk about something that guys shamelessly would do and how would I sound if I were to give it a try.

We have seen and heard a lot of appearances of advertisements that guys often make themselves sound yummy so that girls would be tempted. It’s not that we don’t know what do girls want, but we imagine those guys to think themselves of being a product.

8.5 inches. Lean. Fit. DD Free. Drive.

A few simple words. And it would move someone’s hormones. WRONG. To me (I AM a guy btw), 8.5 inches sounds like pain. Lean sounds like pain (lack of padding). Fit sounds like you can go many rounds without giving a fuck if she had cummed. And drive! We all have the drive don’t we? You can blame my average sized penis for being jealous, or my abs protected with fats tummy. Truth is, we are just denying the girls what they want to hear, and making a human body sounds like beef at a butcher stall.

Here, I shall attempt to create an advertisement for myself, of course, would be saddening and noobish compared to the experienced posters.

5.5 inches (to 0.5 inches accuracy). Average body with a tad of fat. Proven comfy to lie on and provides cushioning for back end positions. No longer fit due to life of luxury. Stamina will be subjected to your appearance and skills. No owned rides, to do my part for the environment. I don’t have a big dick to make you go crazy, I don’t have long lasting erection to pound you tired. I only have patience, time and attention to make you feel like a woman. Applicable to unmarried, open minded girls who would dare to step on the line of morality on a soft, fluffy bed.

It’s long, boring, and unattractive. No big tool, no ride, no Duracell grade stamina, no abs. It’s like offering a puppy to a little girl. And exactly! Why would the girl turn down the puppy? She will have to take care of it, walk it, play with it and even adapt to it. You wouldn’t want to offer a hound, smart and protective. What? So she can ride on it? And get pulled by it on a wagon? And die before her from old age? No way.

We know we make wrong decisions all the time, sometimes filled with guilt that take too much time to fade, wishing you had not made that wrong move. So why the hurry and not write more? Mine is vague, missing details and lack fancy strong words.

Guys, when you are looking for sex, especially for the free ones, please put in more effort and tell the girls about you, not describe what they can see from your picture that you are going to attach anyway. If they are interested, they might not compare that mental image of your tool with other bigger guys, so don’t scare them away with too much info.

Girls are not stupid. They might just deserve more than you. Have a great new year guys!

Army Days

When I was doing my BMT in year 2010, June to October to be exact, I wrote a substantial amount of stories with the ultra mini personal computer (UMPC), a.k.a. netbooks. It wasn’t easy to hide at the top bed and write, but thankfully, I know my buddies in the same bunk can keep secrets.

My buddy’s name is Zack, Zachary for short and he was one of the many who knew what I wrote. Due to the fact I was so busy with my laptop. I didn’t have FaceBook then, cause it was a distraction. When the net was congested, I would write using the top of my cupboard, while listening to my mp3. In a way, I looked like a bookie. Hehe.

But I think it was unusual for guys to want to be turned on in camp, after all, there is nothing to look at! As much as porn is so sought after, I found my calling in words, or texts. So I wrote and wrote. It was the one thing that brought my mind away from the shagness, pain, aches. The next day would always be a scary one due to more training and more strengthening.

Girls, please don’t let your guys have it their way whenever they book out. Make sure they earn it, and not just because they bore with it for a week or two. Although, in the end, please give them what you are willing to do for them and not just all the way cause they felt like it. Hormones are sure raging, but protection, prevention and precaution must still be in place.

Guys, I know it is impossible to access pornography, but you can try going to my website, maybe in incognito mode, the times in BMT, I learnt that at times, my site is blocked, but most of the time it’s up. Get hard, get rest. Everyone knows what goes on in the shower or toilet (getting off if you get what I mean), but getting caught is lame. I do know of one person that got caught and I have no idea how or who.

I wrote non-stop every night, trying to hang on to a piece of reality in the main island of Singapore. the raging hormones definitely helped, and tamed to a certain extent I don’t have to be so vigorous once I booked out.

Love one another guys! 21/12/2012 is coming! Omg! What if my future posts never sees the light? Will someone find my hard disks and experience what is sex in pure lust? Okay. A black cat is looking at me from a distance. Have a good day guys.

Thank you

Hey hey! It’s Jhae here! And I would like to thank a seemingly random person, but she is the one who truly showed me the right way to form English sentences. She is none other than my English teacher from the secondary school I spent 5 years in. After I retained in Secondary 3 (express), she had become my teacher at a subject we speak, write and abuse everyday. Sure, grammer, vocabulary, who cares as long as we are understood? Singlish worked fine in Singapore.

I remembered it was a composition test and no, I did not try writing erotic stories cause it’s just a fine line between psychotic and pervertic, and both would get me sent to the same place, either IMH or unlimited counselling. So I got my paper back and the spelling and grammer was pretty much non-existent. But these long lines of.. ____|‾‾‾‾ appeared all over my texts. I was so confused. So I asked.

Me: ‘Miss Lim, what does these lines meant?’
Ms. Lim: ‘Your sentence structure is wrong.’
Me: ‘But but.. how is it wrong?’

Then lesson ended and for the first time, I wanted to find out what the heck did I learn. When we speak, phrases are formed so quickly and naturally that we do not bear much thoughts to them. People understanding what you wrote does not mean you wrote it well. Taking the previous sentence, the other structure could be ‘Writing well does not necessarily mean people understanding the same message you tried to send’. Making things easier to understand does not mean you did a good job.

I found her after school and she explained through a few examples on how to rephrase, and that secret part of my language mind was unlocked that instant. From then on, I loved writing, proof-reading, and rewriting the whole thing again in a much much more smooth and flowing method. It had become an obsession when you can see two other ways in every existing solutions.

So with that, I am who I am today, writing this kind of.. art? Haha. Thank you Miss Lim. You might not even know who I am, but if these three initials make sense to you, then you are the lady I want to thank. LYW. I still don’t write very well, and my site is wordy, yet the 1.5k readers still supported me daily. All I have is gratitude to Miss Lim, and all you people out there. I know you don’t like to give me money, neither are you guys very rich. So, just keep reading in a form of supporting yeah?

Writing What I Write

Note: This entry has nothing sexual about it. You can treat it as a rant. The entry below is what I feel about the local erotic literature scene in Singapore and the topic of sex as portrayed in my stories. This is an independent view and does NOT represent what other bloggers feel.

In Singapore, the genre of erotic stories exists very lively underground, blogs like undertable999, theinnocentslut, are visited so frequently and had to be done without spying eyes, probably due to the fact that there are photos included in their write ups. The moment you step into any major bookstores in Singapore, you would see top sellers, and almost every category are displayed neatly on shelves. What about erotic storybooks?

When I was in Australia for my training (during NS), the erotica section is not hidden away, and better still, given a fair share of shelf space although in a corner of any book stores of all scales. Why can’t I find a publisher? Why can’t I print articles for sale? One reason would be that the media is controlled by the government, which is not a bad thing at all. We need to be constantly reminded of the bad things that’s happening around the world and be thankful for all the good things we had.

As the push to encourage our citizens to have more babies gets fundings, coverage, basically all the good things. And local writers have access to funds, publisher rights, subsidy, are the local sex bloggers doing anything shameful? For example, we got no choice but to either buy the hard and soft copy of ’50 Shades of Grey’ online, or through other not-so-glamourous ways of getting the PDFs.

This is not about getting money out what of I write, neither it’s unfairness that I felt. According to my site statistics, my page is getting about 1.5k views this month on average and others out there are getting more, I only have myself to blame for the lack of photos. But it’s something I did not want to leverage on too heavily.

Reading is good. You get the details, and my use of (limited) vocabulary words would open you to a few more words you don’t come across in your daily life. Doing what I do best, I am attempting to change how people get off, instead of pictures and videos, to really show that your mind is powerful and creative enough. So much so that you would invent pickup lines, be aware of the social dangers of sex and it’s unlawful exploitations, try out a few more positions, explore private spaces in our modern urban scape.

If you have came (no pun intended) to my site, it’s not about understanding the pervert keyboard warrior, you’re here to let me help you out in your private ‘alone time’ and I am grateful for that. I would love a studio apartment I can write in peace, organise photoshoots and help you guys get a better picture of what my stories are telling.

But look at the stereotype that erotica has in our society, it’s shunned, it’s quiet, it’s unspoken. Readership is one thing, open mindedness is another. Who are we to deny the public of such a subtle erotic content? Basically, reading erotic stories in public is no different from watching porn on the train. Why do we even need a warning that such contents are not suitable for the young? Surely, someone who can understand my complex writing structure would have a base in English and comprehension level would protect those who should not be reading. Adults should even know better what they’re reading.

Is it better for them to explore sex physically first? Or to ‘accidentally’ stumble upon my site (a bit arrogant here I admit) and get an idea before crossing the line?

Do anything, don’t get caught.
Get caught act blur say sorry.
When all fails, prepare to go DB.

That was what my BMT Encik told me and it still applies. Just that DB would probably mean a holiday in a Changi chalet (prison). Casual sex, tempting, accessible. Underage sex, illegal, but still a fetish for many. Rape, always fantasised about, but illegal. BDSM, scary, but sounds fun. Any other kind of fantasies, a dark secret for many but not impossible.

Fashion has changed how people dressed, and it played a huge part in temptation. And more daring outfits are still being innovated everyday. Food itself is a pleasure, and we kiss with where we eat, just that we are ‘tasting’ without really eating. Lingerie (which should be under ‘Fashion’), had evolved, and the thrill of imaging what lies under is still a hobby for many. Then we have the emotional side. Pain, someone somehow discovered it would go well with pleasure, so there we have it. Something we hate, plus something we like, turns into something we lust.

Love is not lust, and vice versa. All of us are destined to live, fall in love, get married, have kids. But what about lust? Does it have a cycle? YOLO (You Only Live Once) ya know? Sex for me, falls under play. And since young, children had ben playing (not sexually of course). We know the fun of getting what we can’t and when we get it, indulge in it. Now, here comes the ‘climax’ of my entry.

Glad to say, the reward system in our society worked. When you do well in school, you get bursaries, monetary rewards. When you get an answer right, you get a chocolate, food rewards. As you grow, you get applauses, hugs, recognition, promotion, in short, emotional rewards. We are conditioned to look at the final outcome and work for it. Sure, sometimes the process is enjoyable, but most of the time, tiring and exhaustive. So, we invented ways to make the process more enjoyable, and on top of that, still retains the emotional satisfaction at the end. I shall skip the process of love making as you would notice the tiring part and the satisfaction part is actually how sex is.

Thus, the ‘forbidden fruit’ term is coined. Guys go after girls, guys seek to ‘eat’ outside, girls seek to escape possessive boyfriends through extreme means (flinging outside their relationships), teachers leverage on their power to grade in exchange for something. Suddenly someone very much older/ younger of the opposite sex seemed fun to chase.

It’s all for the rewards. A mental ‘getaway’ in exchange for a few nanoseconds (for guys) of pleasure. There’s never an outlet where you can get a reward equivalent of your hard work you put in. Except for sex. It’s worth it and we all know it.

So, let this genre of literature spread. Erotica is nothing to be shameful of, and those who could not (or yet to have) access (to) sex are most vulnerable. The fruit itself is sex. Curiosity might kill the cat, for those who are virgins reading my site could get tempted, but along with that, is the preparedness they have to be sure of.

Girls, don’t be in a hurry to lose your virginity. Guys, don’t be jerks and be in a hurry to get virgins deflowered. As forbidden as it is, and as fun as it might sound, there’s no turning back. A simple SMS to an underage ‘you want sex?’ and you can be jailed. I’ve known some very adventurous dudes who have partners willing to go on film, and I can safely say, their sex life is awesome. The level of trust, faithfulness (no matter how much or little), the lines that they draw to protect their personal lives, they are all accounted for.

It takes only one side to be responsible, and everyone is safe. No jail time, no fear, although there could be a tremendous amount of guilt which I trust they can handle or offload in their ways. My final word for everyone reading, don’t let one moment of pleasure ruin your future. Imagine you have to find someone to settle down all over again, imagine you found an awesome guy who made you wish you had saved your virginity for, imagine a life with no risk of STD and have a partner for sex anytime you want (married couples if you quite get it). I’m ignoring the ideal situation of ‘my partner should accept my past and blah blah blah’, that rarely happens and even if it does, there would be some thing you wished you could undo.


Dirty or Beautiful?

Is sex supposed to be dirty, insulting and degrading? Look at all the porn. Guys are just pure sexists, rapists, perverts, minimally, always horny. Then again, it gives the impression that would turn girls (of the wrong age) off till they are ready. It’s just pure dirty and cheap. Double edged.

Erotica, on the other hand, paints sex and the female form in a beautifying manner. No matter guys or girls would be visually pleased to see such an effort done for females. The repercussion? Girls (no matter what age) would look at their bodies differently, and might embrace nudity, sexiness, playfulness and start having sex at the wrong age. Double edged.

Food for thought for today.

Horny Issues

I was addicted to masturbation once, and had to ask her to help me out as many as 3-4 times day, until she got pissed feeling wrong doing it for me. At the staircase of her dad’s shop, at United Square staircase, at the carpark next to United Square, on buses, her house, my house, hotel 81s.

We quarrelled many times over this and I was trying hard to change. Well, I’m not here to address the right and wrongs of changing for your loved ones. I had to do something about it or I will lose her.

So, I tried telling myself, remembering not to do it no matter what. But I soon realised, the more I remind myself  not to be horny/ masturbate, the damn reminder serve as a trigger. It made me want to do it.

Until one day, I’ve decided to say NO to masturbation. I am determined NOT to masturbate anymore and to my surprise, the whole horny issue turned for the better. I only masturbate because I want to, and not because I have to.

Not masturbating solved the problem for me. What about you? Dare to give it a try? I can hold it for indefinitely and at the same, accumulate for my loved one. Wasting your precious soldiers on the bathroom floor or toilet bowl doesn’t feel right. Don’t even bother to do it yourself, get someone else to, hopefully someone you like.

Reducing and eliminating doesn’t make any difference. Stop if you want.